http://jbeaman.com Ela é muita areia para o caminhãozinho dele. Fri, 14 Aug 2009 21:15:07 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en The view from Bar Bocaiúva. I miss you, Bolinho de Carne. I miss you, Marta. http://jbeaman.com/2009/08/14/saudade/ http://jbeaman.com/2009/08/12/pretty-ladies/ Every single place in California that is not the coast or the mountains is Sacramento.  Fremont?  Sacramento.  Bakersfield?  Sacramento.  Riverside?  Sacramento.  I'll give you Oakland and Berkeley but only just. If I say you're from Sacramento it's because I think you're lame. See you in church. http://jbeaman.com/2009/06/19/a-quick-note-about-california/ I went to the clothes store this morning to get some clothes for my new job.  New job.  My new job.  I picked out a bunch of shirts (I have to wear black shirts at my new job.  Kind of a bummer but at least I can grow that Dan ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/06/16/america-why-you-gotta-do-me-like-that/ All you people who constantly ask for me music are now required to listen to this for one week at least 2 hours per day and make a list of all the things you love and then I'll help you out. The rest of you should just listen to it all ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/06/12/the-greatest-music-bloginternet-radio-station-on-the-whole-internet/ http://abcnews.go.com/video/playerIndex?id=7786743 The Dirty Projectors?  ABC News?  Pitchfork?  I don't get it. Oh, and I got a job. Oh, and zero side effects from Chantix. All kinds of good news. http://jbeaman.com/2009/06/12/this-just-doesnt-make-sense/ So, I went to the doctor today because I thought I might have the cancer in my pretty mouth. But it's not the cancer, it's Mucocele.  It's gross but it might just go away on it's own.  But it did light a fire under my ass about the whole ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/06/01/crazy-pills-for-reals/ http://jbeaman.com/2009/04/20/this-tv-show-might-be-the-greatest-thing-that-has-ever-happened-to-me/ Well, folks, I'm back in San Francisco, shifting and adjusting, breathing in the cold air and looking for work.  It's been a dream to shuffle around town, have a glass of wine in the park and poke around my beloved city again.  But no one likes looking for work and ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/04/16/san-franciscos-top-100-jobs/ You're going to lose.  Even midwestern frat boys are sick of your intolerant bullshit. "Straight Huggin'.  No tolerance for intolerance." The quote for our age. http://jbeaman.com/2009/03/13/hey-christianists/ I'll be in the land of the free, home of the brave. Birthplace of not only Playboy but also Penthouse. Brunch. Beer. Tacos. Dolores Park. Seriously. http://jbeaman.com/2009/03/11/april-7th/ http://jbeaman.com/2009/02/20/mary-in-hellbluroliverhudsonmairaamazingness/ Hey you guys, Oliver's here, and it's kinda not fair how much fun he's having. Crazy food, crazy parties - I think he thinks I live like this everyday. I only live like this a couple times a week. But here's some pictures so you get the idea. This is what ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/02/20/category-1/ Lily Allen - It's Not Me, It's You (February 10th) People hate on Lily Allen but people are dicks.  I'm seriously going to wee myself when I finally get a copy of this record.  And I love love love this cover: [audio:lily allen - womanizer.mp3] Other best, unheard records of 2009: Dan Auerbach (Black ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/01/25/best-records-of-2009-that-i-havent-heard-yet/ It's early, I know, but I promise you this will be in this year's top 5: Antony & the Johnsons - Epilepsy is Dancing - From The Crying Light [audio:http://www.jbeaman.com/audio/02%20Epilepsy%20is%20dancing.mp3] And, the bonus, a fucking stunningly beautiful, creepy, epileptic hallucination cabaret number.  With butterflies.  This kind of shit is the reason that ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/01/22/616/ Best Day Ever. http://jbeaman.com/2009/01/20/new-arrivals/ I am, from time to time, struck with the fear that I will, one day soon, suddenly become blindingly irrelevant. Culturally, musically, intellectually. I see it happen to people around me all the time. Ask the average person on the street what their favorite music/book/piece of art is and, almost ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/01/19/animal-collective-fucking-dicks/ Watch all of it. Girl Talk, eat you heart out. http://jbeaman.com/2009/01/17/a-motherfuckin-birdplane/ I though it would be fun to compile a few stats about my list of the best music of 2008: From New York - 23% From Scandinavia - 10% From countries where English is the primary spoken language - 87% Bands with women - 31% From cities I have lived in - 15% Bands that are ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/01/15/best-of-2008-stats/ BCE. Best Christmas Ever. It started with Matias coming over with a huge pork loin with peaches and cinnamon and tasty fatty bits (he even brought a baster - which I still have), basmati rice and yummy potato salad made by the world famous Carmen Burns' mom. We ate, we drank, ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/01/15/christmas-time-aka-i-love-the-lord/ Los Campesinos! - My Year in Lists - (From - Hold On Now, Youngster...) [audio:05 My Year In Lists.mp3] I was excited about them (here and here) and still fucking love it. Sorry, Maíra, You! Me! Dancing!, doesn't have the line "You said, 'Send me stationary to make me horny.'" Lykke Li - ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/01/14/my-favorite-40-albums-of-the-year-the-next-20/ In alphabetical order: A few notes: I'm not going to write about all of them and the things that I do write will be short and dry. And this is not a list of the best songs of 2008 but a single sample of my favorite albums of 2008. And, open this ... http://jbeaman.com/2009/01/12/my-favorite-40-albums-of-the-year/ Here's some new pictures of my new house. It's actually a barracão, an in-law house or a garage apartment. It's amazing and I'm totally in love with it. I thanked some people in the last post but I want to reiterate their awesomeness. Steve spent two full days painting and hanging ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/12/16/the-new-house/ So, folks, I know I haven’t been blogging lately but I have a pile of stories to share; some written, some not. There coming, though, in a big pile early next week. One of the reasons I haven’t been available to write (besides my artful laziness) has been the arduous ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/12/10/housewarming/ drunk, high, super-tall blonde brazilian girl to me last night, "Wow!  I can't believe I'm meeting you in real life.  You only hear about guys like you in books or in the movies." I'm gonna ride that for a month. http://jbeaman.com/2008/12/08/ur-doin-it-rite/ At a party a few nights ago Paper Planes came on and one of my friends, loving it, expressed her love for it. I told her she should go and do a search on YouTube for teenage girls dancing to it in their rooms. I said that never actually having ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/11/25/get-high-like-youtube/ I'm staying in Brazil. Update:I know it seems from the previous two posts that I'm staying here because of California. Not true. I'm staying because it's the right thing to me to do. At least today. http://jbeaman.com/2008/11/06/oh-and/ Ok, I'm going to calm down now. Andrew Sullivan (although is addressing depression, not anger, we all know they're cousins) is always making me feel a little bit better about the world. I beg my gay brothers and sisters: do not let them drive you back to the "psychosis ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/11/06/law-never-trumps-love/ From around the web. I've been read Kottke for a few years and her rarely goes carnal. (link) "You cuntnuggets went and passed Proposition 8. Assgobling fucktards." (link) "Seriously California, what the fuck is wrong with you? I thought you were all granola-eating tree-hugging leftie communist pinkos. I thought you were all for ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/11/06/fuck-you-california/ So, this week I received an email from my dad's brother (the significance of that is here, here and here) who I haven't seen in 25 years. I called him about ten or eleven years ago but I might have been drunk. Those early twenties were a bit jangly. But ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/11/05/a-bittersweet-victory/ People deserve what they get.  But, please, in the name of all that is holy, go out and vote for Barack Obama.  Go volunteer.  And for godsakes if you're in California stand up and tell those fucking Christians (and Mormons and all the other whack jobs) to go and suck ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/29/i-usually-can-give-a-shit-but/ Help. I don't know what the fuck to do.  So, I am soliciting opinions and I will weigh and balance and shift and sink and figure this shit out.  I have a return ticket for January 13th.  Do I use it? Staying or leaving. Why I should stay: a. It's super fun down here. b. ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/28/sera-que-eu-fico-ou-sera-que-vou/ This is probably my new favorite place in Brazil. A little buteco in Santo Antônio owned by the most incredible guy. They had a brief mention in the New York Times last year which is proudly displayed above the bar. Get your feet wet at Mercearia Lili (Rua São João Evangelista, ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/27/mercearia-lili/ I'm going to start a new series of posts on the blog introducing my friends in Brazil (lifted from my friend Sarah, although I'm not going to interview anyone. I don't really care what they have to say) and it's a goddamned treat to present to you Miss Carmen Burns. Carmen ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/15/carmen-fucking-burns/ And by popular (Sarah) demand...videos coming soon. Matias drinking beer in the gas station at 2 in the afternoon on a Saturday. Quality of life. Third world ingenuity. http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/14/a-few-pics-to-tide-you-over/ McCain at the debate: [Obama] voted for nearly a billion dollars in pork barrel earmark projects, including, by the way, $3 million for an overhead projector at a planetarium in Chicago, Illinois. Um, really? An overhead projector? God, What a dick. Photo: Dave Bullock / eecue Three million dollars of pure fucking ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/09/john-mccain-is-a-fucking-asshole-part-2/ Menina Mulher da Pele Preta The black skin of my girl. Blue eyes. White smile. I am not leaving. Calm sleep. Her body. I'm thinking about her, is she thinking about me? There is so much in this song that I understand. It's a little bit of a Portuguese breakthrough. Although I ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/07/maybe-the-sexiest-song-ever/ On Thursday night Matias, Carmen and Maíra came over to watch Californication, drink some beers and eat some tasty viddles. After some David Duchovny love, six or seven beers and as many cigarettes we decided to watch the latest Chris Rock special and as we all watched and laughed the ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/05/nossa/ I miss The Wire. http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/02/a-great-moment-of-civic-comprimise/ Behind the bottles of beer is a chess game. A Copo Sujo (literally dirty cup) is a term that (I think) originates in Belo Horizonte that refers to a small, poorly attended bar, not particularly known for it’s hygiene. It seems (an I may be wrong) that they’re just about as ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/01/copo-sujo/ Steve's insanely cute kid. I found a bacon cheeseburger. My favorite Brazilinan food. Carne de Sol com Mandioca. Little bits of beef with fried mandioca (yucca root). You can get it almost anywhere and it's a neat treat. A weird-ass monkey that was cruising round at Luciana's parents farm. Something weird happened here with ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/10/01/in-pictures/ http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/28/art/ Brad said to me a few weeks ago, "When there's nothing on the blog I just assume things must be going well." Not true really. I'm writing here when things are going well. If I write about the shitty things it's because they're not shitty anymore. I can only write ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/28/what-happened/ And I will say them soon. http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/24/i-have-some-things-to-say/ I know that the blog can and has been bipolar lately but remember, it's a sounding board. I'm not going anywhere. I love it here. I love that it's hard. I miss SF but it will always be there for me. My life is here now. Like a fucking mantra. ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/16/medicine-for-melancholy/ "Be careful, Jay, because they're going to want to make out with you and then they're going to fall in love with you." -- Luciana More later, I promise. With pictures. http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/14/quote-of-the-day/ I went on a date on Wednesday with the girl from the wedding. I spent the bulk of the day alternating between trying to think of ways I could get out of it and reassuring myself that it's the right thing to do: good for me, good for my portuguese ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/13/assassinar/ I think I might buy these glasses and have some sunglass lenses put in them. Any thoughts? In bars here (mostly botecas) each person is often given their only little slip of paper with your name on it and every time you order a beer the waiter will just check it ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/13/gifts-from-the-lord/ Pants on fire. http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/12/john-mccais-is-a-fucking-asshole/ From Matias: She was interviewed by Trip a few years ago, and they asked about what color she thinks she is, her reply was something like "People want to tell me I'm white because I'm famous now, or they'll say I'm a mulata or whatever. That's ridiculous, I'm black. My father's ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/12/camila-pitanga-fuck-gisele/ Sadie Stein is so cute I can't even stand it. I'm moving to New York City. http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/09/new-crush/ Night Two: The Fucking Wedding. So, I got home around 8am with plans to meet steve at 12:30pm requiring an 11:45am bus-catching in turn requiring a 10:30am wake up. Do the math, it sucks. But I made it happen, got to the bus stop and realized that on Saturdays it's at ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/07/two-nights-part-two/ Night One: Pasta Night. No matter what happens to me in BH, a stabbing on the streets of Centro, big romance with a little favela girl, Dengue Fever or if I just go home after a few months to work in restaurants and flirt with waitresses, pasta night will always be ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/07/two-nights-part-one/ I have added a new unit to what I have dubbed the "Total Dedication to Learning Portuguese so I Can Talk to Poor Girls" called "Canta!" I have been listening to my favorite Brazilian songs and trying to memorize them and sing along. I can have a basic conversation at ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/04/deus-ihe-pague/ I'm starting a new series (well, I already started it, but now I have a name) where I will give a small and (hopefully) interesting Portuguese lesson or point out some funny or dumb or otherwise cool language or culture issue. I'm calling it Por Exemplo (because that's what they ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/02/updates-ask-dates-and-other-embarrassments/ For those of you who don't know how amazing the middle western states are (or who think the U.S. is New York, San Francisco and Jesusland), check it. http://jbeaman.com/2008/09/01/i-love-america/ This, in my infinitesimally limited experience, is the most annoying (but then, alternately, awesome) thing about Brazil: Muita areia para o caminhãozinho Too much sand for the little truck. And more specifically: Ela é muita areia para o caminhãozinho dele She is too much sand for his little truck. Explain: This country (or maybe just BH) if ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/29/lessons-in-portuguese/ Or, São Paulo treat #5. It's a drive through fucking zoo. It's amazing. Ric had told us that his friends use Simba Safari as slang for people watching. I LOVE Simba Safari. Now it gets exciting. We had to roll up our windows (we got a two inch crack...you know, for ventilation) ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/26/simba-safari/ This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below: Password: http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/26/secretspystuff/ Took a trip to São Paulo the other weekend for our friend, Ric's, birthday party. After a long(ish), comfortable(ish), overnight bus ride and after Eduardo violently yelled at a passing car that almost hit him, subtly reminding me to never, ever anger a cuddly mustachioed bear no matter how cuddly ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/26/whos-the-band/ I changed the language on facebook to Portuguese and I wanted to share the beauty of one section: Redes: Brazil Status de relacionamento: Solteiro Data de nascimento: 6 de maio de 1974 Cidade atual: Belo Horizonte, Brazil Solteiro. Like a motherfucker. http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/14/solterio/ On the little walk into Savassi today a trashy cocktail waitress (look-a-like) with little star tattoos, ironic 70's Farah Fawcett sunglasses and designer jeans passed by. I stopped her, "Hey, I know you. You hang out at the Lone Palm for Thursday happy hour (or the Longbranch, I can't remember), ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/13/sf-in-bh/ If you look closely you can almost see up her skirt. http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/11/the-view-from-my-backyard/ On the right: Pork with grilled onions. On the left: spaghetti, fries, rice, tomato, romaine, beans. Cost R$9 Eu gosto Brasil. http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/07/a-unique-and-awesome-meal/ Update: Just a little clarity here: This was served in a restaurant and is not uncommon. These people are obsessed with cold beer. I love them. http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/07/ice-cold-beer/ Is Brazil (or BH) obsessed with clever bathroom signs? Social (worst website ever.) From Café Com Letras (one of the coolest places in BH). I can't remember the name of this place (but i'll find out). By far my favorite. I love her little pointy boobs. http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/07/bathroom-signs/ Steve's incredibly cute baby, Leo This is in Mercado Central and those rope-like coils are tobacco of some kind. I'll write about Mercado Central another time but it is, doubtless, the coolest place in all of BH. Mercado Central. Mercado Central. Cerveja. I love it. A new friend (even if he is a Paulista), Ricky ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/08/01/brazil-the-first-two-weeks-in-photos/ A few of my favorite Portuguese words: Saidera: Last Drink or "one for the road" - From the word Saida meaning exit. There is never just one Saidera. Gata: Female cat or hot girl Pedreiro: Bricklayer - I especially like this one because I asked my friend Matias for a good (bad) working ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/07/28/por-exemplo/ Ok, everything's fine. I got a place to live for the next few months (a chance to get my bearings and learn the language). It's in a great neighborhood (Sion, close to Savassi, if you're wondering) with a great guy (Marcelo). It's actually Eduardo's room as he is in Angola ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/07/22/paraglding-in-brasil/ Last night I lay in bed suffering from a mild heart attack flavored something like this: What....the....fuck....is....wrong....with....me.....? You see, I moved to Brasil and I think i'm going to throw up. I don't know how any of this shit works. Here are a few of my anxieties in outline form: ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/07/21/brasilian-flavored-anxiety/ Those of you who know me well know that I actually don't go home with girls very often. I keep them at arms length, flirty and fun, but going home alone is one of the many keys to my happiness. I love waitresses this way. It's their job to flirt ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/07/16/minha-favorita-brasileira/ Goodbye, San Francisco. Hello, Belo Horizonte. http://jbeaman.com/2008/07/12/smell-ya-later/ Oliver registered a domain name a few years back; the enviable iplaythehits.com and has graciously allowed Josh Duty and I to co-blog with him on it. I'll be moving all of my music posts over there but I will probably put up little posts here reminding people to check it ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/07/10/we-play-the-hits/ I'm post-TAL. I'm over it. I think Ira Glass is a narcissistic blowhard who is obsessed with his own sense of narrative and uses his subjects manufacture said narrative often crushing them in the process. I still listen, still cry but more and more I'm just annoyed. RadioLab is the greatest ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/07/05/earworms/ http://jbeaman.com/2008/07/05/i-dont-make-art-art-makes-itself-man/ Sounds about right. http://jbeaman.com/2008/07/02/how-californians-see-america/ Courtesy of Joe Malina. http://jbeaman.com/2008/06/30/joes-visit-on-film/ From The New Yorker FREE-RANGE CHICKENS “Well, it’s another beautiful day in paradise.” “How’d we get so lucky?” “I don’t know and I don’t care.” “I think I’ll go walk over there for a while. Then I’ll walk back over here.” “That sounds like a good time. Maybe I’ll do the same.” “Hey, someone refilled the grain ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/06/29/my-life-through-the-eyes-of-a-chicken/ My first real Brasilian musical find. A little choppy, artsy, post-rock from Belo Horizonte. http://jbeaman.com/2008/06/27/ele-ja-atravessou-todos-os-oceanos-do-mundo/ Every year at SXSW I sign up for 20-50 parties and return to SF to a flood of crapily designed, overly self referential spamish emails. I know, I signed up for the them but I signed up for the free beer and free rock and roll not your messy, sloppy ... http://jbeaman.com/2008/06/26/lightspeed-champion-and-vbstv-plus-no-age/