J. Beaman - The Magazine

So, L. and I haven’t had sex yet. Which is good, because I’m trying to take some pages out of books of better men than I. “What?” you say. “Good men don’t have empty sex?” No. I would never say anything like that but here in my twilight years I find myself more patient and less interested in immediate gratification. I am beginning to enjoy the delay. Not just sex, either. I liked the looking for work (I got a little down some but not much). I liked knowing that running around the city, applying for jobs would eventually pay off. I actually want the great things in my life to actually take a bit of work.

Oh, by the way, I have a “trial” shift at [insert restaurant name and link here except that I’m not sure if they want their restaurant advertised in a blog post about orgasms] on Wednesday. I’m not sure what a “trial” shift is but I think if I don’t suck and they don’t suck I will be working there.

Back to L. So there is no sex but there is a bunch of 9th grade dry humping which is resulting it orgasms for her. I’m happy about that. I love the female orgasm. I actually love it more than my own. I could go into why but I won’t. Suffice it to say I like it when a girl’s eyes roll into the back of their heads because of something I did.

Yay me.

But still, if one were to keep score it would look something like this:

L. - 12
J. - 0