When I was fourteen years old my grandparents took my sister and I to Yerington, Nevada for a Beaman family reunion. I had plenty of family in the town where I grew up but not many Beamans. I have written here before about my Uncle Lee. Here’s an excerpt:

“My Uncle was my hero, an outlaw biker, tattoos old Harley Davidson motorc ycles, and a profound love that he shared vigorously of rock and roll. Throw in that he had a gorgeous wife that was sweet, charming, smart and had tattoos on her tits. So I was fourteen and the man walked on water.”

After a long hot day of barbeque and my grandparents gambling we settled down into the greasy, classically small town Nevada hotel room. It was about nine at night and with me in bed with my grandpa and my sister in bed with my grandma my uncle knocked on the door and asked if my sister and I could hang out in my uncle and aunts room for the night. We didn’t get to see them much and it was a real treat to hang out without my grandparents hanging around.

My grandma said no. She was expectedly curt and sour. After my uncle left, defeated, I whispered to my grandpa, “Come on, gramps. We never get to hang out with them.” My grandpa told me I could go.

As I was putting on my pants, my grandma went fucking crazy. I stormed off in a fourteen year old, punk rock huff with my walkman and a copy of Nevermind the Bullocks and my grandma drove away in a drunken rage.

She didn’t come back. We were 150 miles from home and my grandma just left us. I continually threatened to walk home. “I could make it. It’d be cool. Punk rock. I just need batteries for my walkman and fuck her.” My uncle still makes fun of me for that.

When we finally got home (crammed for hours in my aunts 72 camaro) I refused to eat any food that my grandma would prepare. I was working at a cafe/ice cream parlor and thought I needed no one.

One afternoon my grandpa and I got in a fight about it. He was drunk and I was stoned and both of us were crying and I shouted at him, “Why don’t you just divorce the bitch.”

“Because I love her, son, and I’m just too goddamn old.”